Review of The Barber Surgeon’s Hairshirt by Douglas Lindsay (2001; reissued 2011, Blasted Heath)

After his exploits in The Long Midnight of Barney Thomson, Barney is on the run accused of being one of Scotland’s worst serial killers.  Heading north from Glasgow he has made his way deep into the highlands using his barbering skills to leave a trail of neatly trimmed heads in his wake and nobody with a bad word to say about him.  Running out of money and places to hide he enrols in an isolated monastery cut off from the rest of the world.  Shortly after his arrival the brothers start to drop dead.  It seems like Barney is a natural catalyst and fall guy for serial killers.  With bodies piling up and the snow coming down the only solution to his predicament is to catch the real killer, a task he’s wholly unsuited to.  Meanwhile, DI Joel Mulholland and DC Erin Proudfoot are hot on his trail, and hot for each other, their unconsummated flirting preceding them as they systematically visit every hotel and B&B in northern Scotland.  The question is whether they’ll find Thomson before all thirty monks are murdered and whether they’ll be able to keep acting like monks during their search.

The Barber Surgeon’s Hairshirt (originally published as The Cutting Edge) is an outrageous farce from start to finish.  The tale is divided into two parallel storylines that eventually collide: DI Joel Mulholland and DS Erin Proudfoot journey across northern Scotland hunting the notorious barber Barney Thomson who’s wanted in connection to multiple murders; and Thomson’s refuge in a remote monastery full of men hiding from the world, amongst whom lurks two serial killers, one accused, one real.  Lindsay amplifies all the elements of the plot -- the brooding romance between Mulholland and Proudfoot, the trail of local residents who didn’t feel the need to tell the police when they gave Thomson lodging, the tabloid headlines that accuse Thomson of every crime and missed goal in Scotland’s history, the murders in the monastery, and the bleak winter weather -- and liberally doses the narrative with humour.  For the first half of the novel this works really well.  The story is a funny spoof on crime fiction, told through an engaging voice.  In the second half the telling becomes a bit tedious, repetitive and trying as Lindsay demonstrates his cleverness by spewing a dictionary and quotes, and the plot gets stretched to breaking point as it becomes more and more ridiculous.  Nevertheless, it’s an enjoyable ride overall, especially Mulholland and Proudfoot’s journey, and the next book in the series is queued up on my kindle.

Review of We are the Hanged Man by Douglas Lindsay (Blasted Heath, 2012)

DCI Robert Jericho used to be the most famous detective in Britain having solved a series of high profile cases.  Then his wife, the love of his life, vanished.  Ten years later he’s a sullen, morose copper working in the small cathedral city of Wells, drifting through a stream of meaningless relationships.  Then a tarot card of the hanged man arrives in the post, quickly followed by his boss agreeing to him being a judge and mentor on Britain’s Got Justice, the latest reality television show by uber-TV mogul Steven Washington.  Jericho doesn’t have the right disposition for reality television.  He’s silent and broody and he doesn’t give a damn about the show and its vacuous contestants.  All he wants to do is find out who is sending him tarot cards and why, and he certainly doesn’t want the contestants actively involved in his cases.  But since the police force has signed an all-access contract with the TV company, he doesn’t have a choice.  Then one of the contestants disappears.  Jericho thinks it’s a stunt by the producers, but he’s wrong.  His old nemesis is back at work and he’s definitely someone you don’t amateurs trying to tackle, even if it does make good TV and headlines.

In We are the Hanged Man Lindsay mercilessly satirises reality television to great effect.  At points the story appears to hang on a comic flight of fantasy, but as unlikely as parts of the premise seemed somewhat paradoxically they also felt wholly plausible given the pervasive and intrusive nature of reality television and how society is presently governed.  Indeed, the story is very nicely plotted, thickly laced with dark humour, with a little bit of everything thrown in - drama, intrigue, humour, mystery, tension, romance.  It has some wonderful observational touches, played out through some excellent dialogue and scenes.  The characterisation is very well done, especially the reluctant and gloomy Jericho, his bitchy and resentful boss, the ambitious and morally bankrupt television producers, and the celebrity-seeking contestants of dubious character and abilities.  There are a number of feints and twists and turns, and the story builds to a dramatic climax that has a satisfying resolution whilst also leaving the way open for a follow-on book.  A sign of a great book is that the reader is always looking to create time to read a few more pages and as they near the end there’s a palpable sense of disappointment that the story will soon end.  We are the Hanged Man was one of those books and it’s my read of the year so far.